seeing good

[.livejournal.com]

bandfic!slight ontae
pg; 658 words
drama/angst

Jinki always sees the good in people, subtly praising them for their skills, assuring them that they have the abilities. He always sees the good in his members, even if they couldn’t, and would often bring their abilities to light. Jinki always sees the good in his members, especially in Taemin. For Taemin was young and enthusiastic and passionate and kind, and Jinki could always see the most promising abilities overflowing from such a young person. He encourages Taemin, pushes Taemin to do his best without forgetting who he is and how he should behave. Taemin relishes in the attention–his hyung helps him see what is in him, and is helping him become a successful artist, an exemplary being, a good person. One night, Taemin stumbles into the dorm, and Jinki is waiting by the receiving room. Taemin doesn’t want to face him, but he has to report to their leader about the consequences they have to suffer. Because while it’s true that Taemin has something good in him, he also stumbles, and this time he stumbles and falls into a scandal that leads into a late-night talk with their superiors. “Hyung,” Taemin starts. “I’m..” Jinki sits on the couch, unblinking. “Drinking with friends and hooking up with a girl in public and then making a mess of yourself afterwards,” Jinki softly says, and Taemin could almost feel himself sinking into the floor. “Taemin-ah, why?” Taemin hangs his head and laces the fingers of both his hands together. “Hyung,” he whispers. “I guess…I don’t really have anything good in me.” Jinki’s eyes widen. Without another word, the leader stands up and walks quietly into his room. Taemin drops to the floor and cradles his aching head with his hands. Why couldn’t he just apologize then? Then again, Jinki, who is very nice and welcoming, will eventually forgive him, right? After all, he sees people positively, and soon Taemin will be able to see his smiles again. So when days passed without the leader showing any signs of forgiving him, Taemin starts to worry. He tries to get Jinki’s attention and follows him around, but the leader doesn’t even look his way. Taemin tries talking to him during meals when all five of them are gathered, but all his jokes and questions seem to fall onto deaf ears. The rest of the members eye the two of them warily, but try to act as if nothing amiss has happened. “Hyung, are you going out?” Taemin asks one day as he spots Jinki tying his shoes near the threshold. “Can I come?” Jinki doesn’t say a word, so Taemin just follows him to the door. The door suddenly opens and Kibum enters. “Oh, Jinki-hyung,” Kibum said with a smile and Taemin is almost jealous when he sees Jinki do the same. “Are you going out with him?” Kibum asks Jinki again, referring to Taemin. Jinki turns around to look behind him, and Taemin freezes as their eyes almost meet. But Jinki turns back quickly, as if he hasn’t seen anyone or anything. “Very funny, Bummie. I’m not the one who gets scared of ghosts at night.” With a small wave, Jinki leaves the dorm. Taemin stares at the closed door in shock. “Hyung…” he addresses Kibum who studies him in what look like both pity and concern. “Hyung…why doesn’t Jinki-hyung recognize me?” Kibum sighs and places a hand on Taemin’s shoulder. “Taemin-ah. Jinki-hyung only sees the good in people.” “I know,” Taemin replies, yet he feels like he’s missing something. Nodding, Kibum continues. “Jinki-hyung only sees the good in people. So what will he see if the person has nothing good in them? What will he see if someone says there isn’t anything good in them?” As Kibum walks to the kitchen, Taemin stares at the door once more. He has said it. He has told Jinki that there’s nothing good in him. So Jinki can only see nothing. .end.